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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23716915">Do You Still Feel Like Me?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnTheWrongSideOfTheBed/pseuds/OnTheWrongSideOfTheBed'>OnTheWrongSideOfTheBed</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Oasis (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Homophobic Language, Kissing, M/M, Masturbation, Violence, blowjob, drug and alcohol mention, very short explicit thoughts about heterosexual sex</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 21:48:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,642</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23716915</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnTheWrongSideOfTheBed/pseuds/OnTheWrongSideOfTheBed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam would like to be Noel's boyfriend.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Liam Gallagher/Noel Gallagher</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>He comes closer. And closer. Even closer. He’s way too close. Noel wants to run away, every fiber in his body vibrates and his heart beats so hard in his chest he swears he can feel it swinging back and forth. But he can’t leave, he’s trapped between the sofa and Liam who is trying to breath up Noel’s air until he’s suffocating.</p><p> </p><p>Maybe he is already suffocating, his brain is certainly not functioning the way it should be. There are lips on his, way too hot for his cold insides, dripping down their fire and burning him up until he’s crumpled to ashes. Maybe Liam will hold him in his big palms and sprinkle him over the grass out in the garden then. Maybe he will try to roll him up into a joint and smoke him. How could anyone know what he will do when he thinks the reasonable thing to do is go and kiss his older brother.</p><p> </p><p>Noel kisses him back on instinct. It’s a reflex like drinking when he’s thirsty, scratching when he’s itching, holding Liam when he visits his bed late at night. His mouth seals Liam’s shut and the silence is very welcome to his ears. For once they aren’t tortured by Liam’s forever ongoing chatter.</p><p> </p><p>Liam doesn’t keep his mouth shut for long. He moans wetly against Noel and his tongue is out to find Noel’s. And who is Noel to separate what’s so clearly meant to be together? He licks back inside Liam’s mouth riding on the millions of explosions his nerves fire into his brain. He knows he can’t keep acting like this is just something brothers do that doesn’t affect him in the slightest, but Noel wishes he could.</p><p> </p><p>It’d make everything so much easier. If everyone liked kissing their little brother on the mouth with just a little too much tongue and maybe even thinking about getting their mouth somewhere else farther down, Noel wouldn’t have to fight so hard to keep his sanity right now. It feels way too easy to just keep basically tonguefucking Liam and not sparing a second thought about it, but he knows that that isn’t possible for him.</p><p> </p><p>“Oww, what was that for, fucker?”, Liam cries as he hits the floor. Noel grits his teeth. It hurts, he’s doing that way too often, but probably still not as much as Liam’s head that made a really ugly sound when it smashed to ground. “I told you not to touch me, you little idiot”, Noel hisses, “want me to kick your head in so you finally understand it?”</p><p> </p><p>He gets up and towers over Liam who’s still rubbing his head on the floor where Noel's pushed him. His foot twitches and the urge to actually step on Liam’s face and crush his nose is nearly as overwhelming as the need to fall down on top of him and kiss him senseless right there.</p><p> </p><p>Liam’s bottom lip shakes and Noel knows that he’ll start crying angry tears any minute now and he really doesn’t want to be there for that. His brother hates crying in front of others but he’s got so little control over himself that it happens <em>all the time </em>and Noel can’t be bothered dealing with him when he gets so angry over it that he starts smashing up everything that dares to be in his sight.</p><p> </p><p>“’m leaving. Try not to drown in your tears, yeah?”, he spits and then he’s out the door. Out to somewhere Liam’s stupid face won’t haunt him with every step he takes.</p><p> </p><p>---</p><p> </p><p>“’ave you ever had a boyfriend?”, the little fucker stops sucking a love bite into Noel’s neck to ask. “Fuck are you talking about?”, Noel replies and his voice isn’t as harsh as he wants it to be, because Liam is so fucking warm against his body. “You know what I mean”, Liam mumbles, “have you ever had a boyfriend? Y’know, it’s like a girlfriend just with a dick instead.”</p><p> </p><p>“I fucking know what a boyfriend is”, Noel says. He can practically feel Liam rolling his eyes exasperatedly when he pushes, “yeah, but did ya have one?” “Why d’you wanna know so bad?”, Noel says and he feels a bit ridiculous playing this game but what else is he supposed to do?</p><p> </p><p>Liam sighs deeply and to Noel’s utter surprise he seems to let go of it. Someone up there must really like him today. The silence doesn’t last for long though – when does it ever when Liam’s there? He has reverted to sucking Noel’s neck and Noel just started to like him again when he looks up at him and says sweetly, “I could be your boyfriend, Noely.”</p><p> </p><p>Decidedly Noel doesn’t answer him. What does he think? That he’d cry happy tears and propose to him right there and then? Fucking idiot. His hand tightens in Liam’s neck, probably bruising the sensitive skin. “Don’t you think I’d be a good boyfriend, Noel?”, he asks unbothered by Noel trying to snap his neck.</p><p> </p><p>He’s unbelievable. Noel huffs. Shakes his head. Rolls his eyes up to the sky. Someone help him, the kid’s gone absolutely mad. “What d’you mean?”, he finally says and the words feel far away from his thoughts. Liam’s come up from his neck now and hovers uncomfortably close to Noel’s face. Everything is uncomfortably close really, he lies pressed on top of Noel in his bed and Noel knows that he can feel the hard-on he always gets as soon as they touch more than hands.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not the position of power Noel would wish to be in if he has to put up with this type of conversation but at least Liam’s also hard against his leg. Maybe even harder than him and he’d say that for the kid a touch of hands is already enough to get him there. That helps him at least slightly to keep his composure.</p><p> </p><p>“I think I’d be a fucking great boyfriend”, Liam grins down at Noel. “I’d treat you so well, always be nice, go out with you and hold your hand, go home with you and have sex…”, he trails off then, his eyes hanging onto some vision Noel doesn’t want to see. He fists his hand into Liam’s hair and pulls. Hard, because he’s maybe the dumbest person Noel’s ever met. “Have you finally lost your last brain cells? Can’t’ve been that many anyway, did someone just hit you over the head and that was it then? Nothing left but dead flies in there, right?” He pulls again.</p><p> </p><p>“Stop, that fucking hurts!”, Liam complains and his eyes are back down on Noel. Definitely not in that vision or whatever anymore. “Good, maybe that brings back some of your common sense. Not that you ever had much of that either”, Noel says and he’d like to do so much more than just pulling his hair.</p><p> </p><p>“Why’re you so fucking mean now?”, Liam asks and his brows are furrowed over his not yet angry eyes in a way that Noel would call adorable if he’d ever become the kind of person who uses words like that. “Why’re you so fucking stupid now?”, he replies and he’s feeling very childish again.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m not stupid”, he protests and Noel can see how upset he is. “Why don’t you think that I’d be a good boyfriend?”, he asks and his eyes are boring into Noel’s, daring him to say something wrong so he can drown him in all his disappointed anger. “Never said that now, did I?”, Noel says with so much forced ease that he doesn’t get why Liam doesn’t just call his bluff and laughs straight in his face.</p><p> </p><p>But his eyebrows just draw together further in confusion, “what’s your fucking problem then?” “Never said I had a problem either”, Noel answers and now he’s close to laughing. Liam’s so easy to play, it’s ridiculous. “Cunt”, Liam says and Noel can still see the welled up hurt in his eyes but he leans down and closes them and kisses Noel again.</p><p> </p><p>He’s so soft under Noel’s hands, his clothes, his hair, his skin, and maybe somewhere in his chest he wishes that he could take Liam’s hand and take him out before going home and feeling him like this again. Liam softly bites into his lip and grinds his dick against Noel’s leg and thoughts become way slower in his head and less of a priority.</p><p> </p><p>---</p><p> </p><p>Blue eyes under long lashes and a too red mouth. Noel blinks. A girl under him, blonde hair and rosy cheeks. He sighs. Tongue in her mouth and his hand on her tit. He squeezes his cock. Hand between thighs and wetness. He flicks over his foreskin. Short brown hair and needy fingers on his arm. He hisses. Opens his eyes. Wide spread thighs and hard cock against glistening softness. Strokes up his length. Teeth on his neck and hairy legs pressing into his. Tightens his fist. Moans, too loud. Shudders, wanks harder. A cock sliding against his and precome dripping on his stomach, not his. Groans, pumps his fist faster.</p><p> </p><p>“Y’know, if I were your boyfriend you wouldn’t have to do that.” Eyes fly open and there’s Liam. The real one this time, leaning against the door frame with a barely concealed hungry look in his eyes. “Fucking hell”, Noel nearly screams and drags the duvet up to cover himself. “What on earth are you doing here?”, he hisses and hopes that his angrily flashing eyes burn Liam up until the only trace left of him is the slightly charred door. He doesn’t burn up and walks over to Noel’s bed completely unbothered.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking leave, you idiot! How did you get the idea that I want you here?”, Noel spits and feels his anger crawling into his hands when Liam just smiles at him. He’d deck him right in the face if he didn’t have to get up with his still raging hard-on for that. “’m just here to fulfil me boyfriendly duties, aren’t I?”, Liam grins now and his eyes trace over Noel’s face as if he could read something there Noel can’t remember writing.</p><p> </p><p>“Shut up”, Noel says, willing his anger down into his chest where it’ll wait for him later. He needs to be calm now or else Liam might just overwhelm him and then god knows what could happen. “You shouldn’t talk like that, you never say that to your girlfriends”, Liam says thoughtfully. Noel scoffs, “well tough luck, but you aren’t one of my girlfriends. You still know that somewhere in your screwed head, right?”</p><p> </p><p>Liam still smiles at him. “Nah, I know that. ‘m not your girlfriend, I’m your boyfriend, right Noely?” Noel can feel his lips draw into that shape that’ll be responsible for the lines on his face when he’s older. It’s disgusting. But his cock is still way too hard and he has to fight off the desire to get his hand back on it. Liam really needs to leave now or he can’t be made responsible for his actions anymore. Liam scoots closer to him.</p><p> </p><p>“Is that so?”, Noel says and hates himself. He better doesn’t answer that, because else he has to either beat up Liam or himself. Thank god for once Liam seems to listen to his brother’s thoughts and keeps his mouth shut. He puts it on Noel’s though and then Noel opens it up himself again with his tongue. He kisses him deeply and a bit too harsh judging by Liam’s quiet whimpers, but he doesn’t care.</p><p> </p><p>He winds a hand into Liam’s hair and because he’s given up he gets his other hand back on his cock. It feels fucking good and he groans into his brother’s mouth while he wanks himself off. Liam starts to lean heavily against him, going pliant under Noel’s hand and with the way his older brother shamelessly keeps kissing him while he does what he’s doing. Noel presses him tighter against him and sucks on Liam’s tongue and it’s only a few more strokes before he feels his guts tightening and he’s coming hot all over his hand.</p><p> </p><p>He pushes Liam off him when he’s finished but he feels warmer on the inside now and grins at him, “still had to do it myself now, didn’t I?”</p><p> </p><p>---</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is a bit all over the place, but I wanted to get it out now.<br/>I wanted to keep this as short snapshots of their progressing "relationship", but this one's a bit longer and the last one that'll hopefully follow quite soon will be too, so so much for story planning...</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Noel has gone out with his mates and is far more than halfway to being absolutely drunk out of his mind when he spots Liam. He is surrounded by a bunch of strangers or at least Noel has never seen these people before and he feels almost stone cold sober again.</p><p> </p><p>Liam is drinking heavily and probably already has been for quite some time judging by the way he’s swaying all over the place. He seems unnaturally happy though, smiling and laughing while everyone is hanging off his lips. Ridiculous, if you ask Noel. The kid’s a complete idiot, mad beyond the point of help, and he’s never understood why everybody always is so fascinated by him.</p><p> </p><p>Although if he’s completely honest, he does understand it. It’s in his eyes and the way he moves his lips when he speaks and how he walks and waves his hands all over the place. He’s a fucking Rockstar. And sometimes Noel feels like his most pathetic groupie. But not now, no, he’s out with his mates and he’s gonna have a fucking good time. Liam can do whatever the hell he wants.</p><p> </p><p>He gets another pint and another one, and maybe another one after that, he’s not so sure honestly. And he has fun. Hanging out with his mates and flirting with waitresses and doing lines off the toilets and it doesn’t matter if his baby brother is doing the same just metres away from him. But then he hears Liam’s voice too loud over the chatter in the pub and the alarm bells in his head start ringing again.</p><p> </p><p>He’s still swaying back and forth in between a crowd of people but now his fists and shouting have a great deal more to do with it and that’s it for Noel. He’s up from his seat and mumbles something to his mates, doesn’t even know what really, and he’s pushing through people, elbows and shoulders, until he’s there with him. Noel isn’t even sure what Liam is saying, just knows that he’s way too loud and way too aggressive so he gets him by the arm and starts dragging him away.</p><p> </p><p>Liam swings round to him and Noel expects to be fucking hit over the head but then Liam’s eyes find his and he goes soft under his hand instead. No more fighting back, just big eyes and trudging after him while Noel pulls him through the crowd. Why can’t he always be like this? They get outside and something in Noel wants to scream at him <em>you idiot! What do you want – another hammer to the head? You’ll get yourself fucking killed! </em>but Liam is looking at him in this weird open way he has sometimes and his eyes seem to swallow Noel. So he doesn’t scream, just hisses, choking on Liam’s gaze, “what the fuck are you doing here?”</p><p> </p><p>Liam smiles serenely as if he hadn’t been about to fight half a dozen blokes just seconds ago and answers, “well I was just having a couple drinks, wasn’t I? Until someone here decided to go and kidnap me.” He blinks down at Noel, a little church boy who’s never told a lie in his life, not even when he kicked a ball through the window and could’ve gotten away with blaming it on his brother. Anybody who isn’t Noel and hasn’t known him since his first breath probably would’ve bought it. Thought they’d completely misread the situation, because clearly this lovely boy would never start a fight with anyone.</p><p> </p><p>Unfortunately, Noel has witnessed him a few times too many throwing angry punches at anyone who remotely looked like a human being and getting his face smashed up in return until it looked like he was wearing long spoiled make up. It was a bit pretty, though. But Noel always likes it better when it is his hands painting his brother’s face unusual colours and he isn’t going to watch others doing his job tonight.</p><p> </p><p>He’s found his voice again – not yet his screaming voice, but this’ll do – and spits, “come off it, mate! Every time I get to have just a little bit of fun you find a way to come in and ruin it all!” Suddenly his blood is boiling and his hands are clenching open and shut all on their own. Liam’s getting worked up as well, his smile has dropped and he’s fidgeting all over the place like he’s ready to snap and jump right into Noel’s face.</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t fucking call me ‘mate’! Like you weren’t watching me all night like some jealous boyfriend! But don’t worry, I’ll only suck your cock, promise and all”, he yells way too loudly and Noel twitches. “Shut up”, he grunts, still not able to shout, and grabs Liam’s arm again dragging him away from the pub into a quiet dark alley.</p><p> </p><p>He pushes Liam up against the brickwall and considers splitting his head open against it. “So you’re completely insane now, yeah? You really think you’re my boyfriend, don’t you? I’m your<em> fucking</em> <em>brother</em>, Liam, you’re my <em>brother</em>, I’m not your <em>boyfriend</em>!” His mouth is cold and he can’t feel his lips, but he sees his spit flying onto Liam’s face while he’s finally shouting, screaming, and it feels as out of control as Liam makes him feel.</p><p> </p><p>Liam doesn’t even flinch as Noel practically bites the words into him with how close his face has moved to Liam’s, an angrily distorted grimace of his normal features. He’s so untypically calm again and Noel doesn’t get it.</p><p> </p><p>“I know you’re my brother.”</p><p> </p><p>Noel wants to scoff <em>good</em>, but on Liam’s tongue the word has this lovely sound and he just stays quiet. Liam continues, his voice so soft it feels like it’s reaching right through Noel’s chest to where he keeps the feelings that should be spoken about in this voice. “I know you’re my brother, but I think <em>you </em>know as well that I’m in love with you.”</p><p> </p><p>He says it, just like that. <em>I’m in love with you. I know you’re my brother. </em>All of Noel’s air is knocked out of his lungs and he pants, feeling like he just ran a marathon and everything in his body is hurting and burning. He doesn’t answer, just stares. And Liam repeats, “I’m in love with you.” His voice is still so soft but Noel hears the urgency behind it, sees it gleaming in his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>And it isn’t like he doesn’t know, it’s obvious. To him, and probably also to his mam and Paul. Thinking this should make Noel sick and he does feel an echo of it prickling in his stomach, but there is also something so much lighter than his shame and guilt, something floating higher above it and tugging at his insides. And tonight he’d much rather fly with this than drown in the depths of his depravity.</p><p> </p><p>So he fists a hand into the front of Liam’s t-shirt and tugs him closer until they’re almost touching foreheads. He makes himself look into Liam’s eyes even though they’re almost burning him up and tries to find a voice matching Liam’s. His sounds rougher, filled with the sharp edges and holes of his desire, but he thinks that Liam gets what he’s trying to do.</p><p> </p><p>“Tell me that again?”</p><p> </p><p>And he does, growling deep voice and still so sweet, “I’m in love with you, Noel.”</p><p> </p><p>Soft dark lashes are the last thing Noel sees before he kisses him. Liam’s lips have never felt so real before, he thinks. So soft when moving under his and so wet and eager for what Noel will give him. He kisses him hard and they’re both out of breath and then there’s tongue, because he can never just stay like that, always wants more and more of Liam, every last bit he can get.</p><p> </p><p>It’s rough, pressing into each other and sometimes more teeth than tongue, but Noel feels calm inside the storm they’re conjuring up together. It’s missing the edge of his anger and not-knowing if he’ll still be here two seconds later and it’s a better feeling than the cocaine his mate got him three months ago. He’s invincible here with Liam in this dirty alley that he probably won’t recognize in the sunlight.</p><p> </p><p>He drops to his knees and feels Liam’s eyes burning through his skull. “Noel”, he whispers and Noel knows that he can’t quite believe what he’s doing. He blows him so rarely, otherwise it’d just get to his head, he tells himself. But now he’s fiddling with Liam’s zipper like his life depends on it and his head is going dizzy with how much he wants it.</p><p> </p><p>“Noel”, he whispers again and Noel looks up impatiently, but Liam smiles shyly, “let me.” His fingers brush over Noel’s and then he opens his fly for him and pulls himself out and Noel can see that his hands are trembling slightly. He takes him in his hand and Liam pulls his own hand away, using it to play with Noel’s hair instead.</p><p> </p><p>His cock is half-hard already and Noel starts stroking him up and down before bowing down and taking him in his mouth. He’s heavy on his tongue and Noel has to relearn to breathe for a second, because maybe it’s really been a while since he’s last sucked cock. But he gets on with it anyway and makes his mouth tight around Liam, sucking him back as far as he can manage.</p><p> </p><p>And it’s worth it, Liam’s breathing has gone shallow and his cock is fattening up rapidly in Noel’s mouth. His fingers are tightening in Noel’s hair and Noel jerks his head telling him to stop that. Liam actually obeys and loosens his grip a bit, only resting his hand on top of Noel’s head and that feels alright.</p><p> </p><p>Noel continues sucking him, getting him in deeper as he remembers how to trick his gag reflex and bobs his head up and down Liam’s shaft. He feels Liam’s thighs starting to tremble and if his mouth wasn’t stuffed full of cock he’d grin smugly. He can save it for later. For now he’s going to make him come and faster than he’s ever done as well.</p><p> </p><p>He takes him down all the way and grabs Liam’s waist, holding him still against the wall so he can’t push forward. Above him Liam whines and he rubs Noel’s head in odd circles, his fingers searching for something they’re allowed to do. And then Noel pulls off and Liam’s eyes widen in desperation but he tells him with cock-sucking-hoarse voice to “say it again” and Liam understands.</p><p> </p><p>Noel swallows him down again and he looks up when Liam repeats, “I’m in love with you.” His eyes bore into Liam’s and then Liam’s hips jerk free from Noel’s grip and he splutters around his dick and then hot come is filling his mouth. He swallows as good as he can, but he feels it running down his chin and dripping onto his shirt while Liam is moaning above him.</p><p> </p><p>Finally he pulls off. Liam is leaning back against the wall, still panting, and Noel takes his soft dick and wipes it down with Liam’s shirt before tucking it back inside Liam’s pants and zipping him up. He gets up from the floor and pushes back the thoughts about what kind of shit he probably just got onto his jeans.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>“You know, I’m in love with you?” It’s dark without any streetlights in sight and Liam stumbles against Noel’s shoulder as they walk home.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Chapter 3</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It's Liam's birthday and Noel has agreed to take him out for it.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is very very cheesy and probably not very in character, but sometimes we deserve nice things, right?</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Alright, alright, fuck – Liam!”, Noel groans, his hands tightening in his brother’s hair. He pushes forward, choking Liam a little and moans again. “Alright, I’ll take you out, just –“, and his baby brother sucks him harder, eyes sparkling with happiness as Noel comes hot down his throat.</p><p> </p><p>---</p><p> </p><p>And that’s how he got here, Liam sitting opposite him in a chair that seems way too fragile for actual people and holding a little painted cup of tea that simply looks ridiculous in his big hands. It’s his birthday and he’s been pestering Noel for the last two months to go away with him for it. Or rather to “go out on a proper date like.” He’s been persistent, the bastard, and some time around a week before, he’s finally exhausted Noel’s willpower – and after all it <em>is </em>his birthday and it probably won’t hurt Noel’s reputation too bad if he does one nice thing for Liam.</p><p> </p><p>So he agreed to take Liam out for the day (and the night in Louise’s flat, that’s coincidentally empty then) and showed up at one in the afternoon after their mam’s had her fill of birthday-Liam and took him down to the bus station so they could go somewhere out of their neighbourhood where they’re less well-known.</p><p> </p><p>Noel’s been to this café once before with some girlfriend he can’t remember that well, but he remembers sitting here feeling uncomfortable while thinking about how much Liam would love all the corny décor and pretty cakes. And he was right, immediately when they step inside Liam’s eyes light up and make Noel’s heart clench.</p><p> </p><p>He looks so wrong in this little doll house-like café with his rough jeans and his too big shirt and Noel is a bit scared that he’ll raise his voice and shatter the porcelain with it. But Liam’s uncharacteristically quiet now, just sitting there sipping on his tea and staring at Noel with big eyes. Big eyes Noel hopes nobody will recognize as the same ones he has. Because no matter how hard he made it for Liam to convince him to do this, he isn’t sure he’s able to hide how much his heart speeds up when he looks at him.</p><p> </p><p>“D’you want some cake as well now that we’re on it?”, Noel hears himself say. Maybe Liam deserves a little reward for behaving so well and not trying to annoy Noel into buying him cake himself. He nods and the way he looks at Noel is definitely worth the far too expensive pieces of cake he’s about to buy. An awkward wave of his hand brings over a waitress that looks positively ridiculous in her pink uniform, but Noel keeps it together and he’s proud of Liam for only grinning a little into his tea and keeping his mouth shut otherwise.</p><p> </p><p>“What would you like?”, she asks and Noel looks at Liam, but his brother seems to have become shy at once and so Noel takes a look at the glass counter himself where all the cakes are displayed and tries to guess what Liam would like. “We’ll have the one with the cherries and the other one with the strawberries, and you could get us one of those chocolate things over there as well, thanks”, he decides and hopes that fits Liam’s tastes. It better does with the way he’s draining Noel’s pockets.</p><p> </p><p>She brings over the pieces on tiny plates that look like their pretty teacups only a minute later and Liam thanks her when she sets them down on their table. He tries to make up for acting like a shy kid before and it’s a little endearing. “Alright?”, Noel asks him and Liam grins at him, “Yeah yeah. But what will you have?”</p><p> </p><p>“Cheeky cunt”, Noel says and picks up a fork, taking a pointedly large bite of the cherry one. Liam’s grin only widens and he picks up a fork as well, cutting off a piece of the cherry one where Noel’s fork just slid along, then one off the strawberry one and finally stuffs a bite of the chocolate tart in his mouth so his cheeks fill out like he’s three years old again.</p><p> </p><p>Noel is almost embarrassed by laughing at his stupid little brother’s antics, but it’s his birthday and that probably makes him deserving of a little attention from his older brother. They eat the rest of the cake and Noel listens to Liam chattering away, only minimally making fun of him and it feels really nice. So nice he doesn’t even mind when Liam’s hand sneaks on top of his between all the plates and cups.</p><p> </p><p>His palm is hot and despite Liam continuing to talk nonchalantly he can feel his pulse throbbing in his fingers. Noel pretends to not notice either, his hand or the little blush that creeps up Liam’s neck, and eats another piece of cake, leaving the last bite for Liam. He pushes the plate towards him and Liam’s fingers tighten around his when he eats the last bit.</p><p> </p><p>After a while his brother seems to have run out of chatter, so Noel waves the waitress over again to get the bill. When he pays, he tips her as generously as he can afford like he was actually on a date trying to impress a bird. Liam watches him with raised eyebrows and Noel fends off feeling ridiculous by schooling his expression into big-brother-superiority.</p><p> </p><p>He ushers Liam out of the café, their bodies probably way too close for people who figured out why their faces look so weirdly similar. But today Noel doesn’t really care, they’re far enough away from home and people can think what they want – there must be things more scandalous than two brothers in love with each other. He puts his hand on the small of Liam’s back and guides him down the steps until they’re on the street where Liam turns to him and asks a bit annoyed, “what’re you doing that for? I can walk on me own just fine, thank you very much.”</p><p> </p><p>And it’s just like him to misunderstand the little bit of romance Noel allows himself towards Liam as Noel ‘brothering’ him. He’s about to shrug and roll his eyes when in a sudden change of moods Liam grabs his hand and entwines their fingers. He does that sometimes when they’re in bed and most often it hurts Noel more than it feels good, reminding him too much of something he’s longing for that’s just out of his reach.</p><p> </p><p>Liam is tugging him down the street before he can think about anything like that though and he follows easily. It’s only when he feels like Liam’s about to start skipping that he slows him down, holding him back by his hand. “Easy”, he says and laughs when Liam turns around and scowls, but he squeezes his hand and Liam seems to remember what Noel is giving him. He smiles brilliantly at Noel and Noel would like to tug him in the alley over there and kiss him until he feels his smile etched into his lips. But he actually has plans beyond drinking tea in the world’s cheesiest café, so he walks them back to the bus station instead.</p><p> </p><p>When they get there Noel lets go of Liam’s hand and he’s glad that Liam doesn’t say anything, but on the bus their legs press together all on their own and Noel can’t find the strength to move away. When they get off, Liam doesn’t grab his hand again and he doesn’t need to, because Noel already feels like he’s burning up just from their arms brushing together one too many times while they’re walking.</p><p> </p><p>He leads Liam to a cinema that he’s been to a few times with another girlfriend that lives in this area and he feels a little guilty that he’s taking Liam to all these places (tonight he’ll even sleep in the spot where Noel lies down with his current girlfriend), but it’s the best it gets, he tells himself.</p><p> </p><p>They go in and for a second Noel thinks they’re the only people in there until he makes out the few workers scattered around in the half-dark. He goes up to the counter, Liam in tow, and buys two tickets to some action movie that he couldn’t care less about and two cokes and popcorn as well. Liam grabs the bottles and the popcorn while Noel pays and together they make their way into the room to find their seats.</p><p> </p><p>The commercials are already playing and there’s no one else in the room – probably because it’s half past three on a workday. Liam climbs up the stairs in front of Noel and it looks ridiculous how his long limbs are stumbling in the dark in his typical swaggering walk, but Noel can’t take his eyes off him. When he’s reached the last row, Liam settles into the seat in the middle, stretching out his legs and grinning at Noel while he puts the cokes into the holders attached to the seats.</p><p> </p><p>Noel lets himself fall into the seat next to Liam and takes his coke, drinks until it’s half empty. He puts it away again and finds Liam staring at him under heavy lids. The kid slowly licks his lips and Noel isn’t sure if he has learned that in some porno or if his life has become just that, but he tilts his head nonetheless and pulls Liam in for a kiss.</p><p> </p><p>He feels Liam huff impatiently against his lips before he seals their mouths together. Their tongues tangle immediately, gliding against each other with wet sounds and Noel’s hands find their way into Liam’s hair while Liam holds onto his arm. Noel sinks back further into his seat, so Liam has to follow and drag himself over the lean between them, leaving him lying almost on top of Noel.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not very sophisticated, Liam is already panting and Noel is drawing him in closer and closer, hungrily planting kisses on his mouth alternating with messy licks all over Liam’s lips and tongue. He feels like a stupid teenager, but he can’t really be bothered keeping himself in check, not when he hasn’t kissed Liam in days and he has been this lovely all day.</p><p> </p><p>He considers making Liam climb into his lap when suddenly he hears footsteps and someone clearing their throat. Liam just keeps kissing him, even chooses this very moment to fucking whimper against Noel’s lips, but Noel pushes him away and hastily sits up straight. There’s a guy standing in front of the screen holding up some kind of basket filled with sweets or something like that. “Would you like to buy some ice-cream?”, he calls up to them and he sounds about as embarrassed as Noel feels.</p><p> </p><p>“No thank you”, he manages to get out, which Liam seems to take as his cue to lean over again and suck on Noel’s neck. Right now it seems more embarrassing to try fending him off so Noel just stares the poor bloke down with Liam drooling all over him until he mumbles, “alright then, enjoy the film” and shuffles out of the door.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking hell, Liam, was that really necessary?”, he shoves him away and scowls. His brother isn’t bothered though, he smiles at Noel with obscenely spit-slick lips and answers, “he didn’t see our faces anyway, it’s proper dark in here.” Noel laughs, maybe a little hysterically, “he could still see that there’s a bloke sucking my face off though, you get that, do you?”</p><p> </p><p>“So what?”, Liam shrugs as if he didn’t understand in the slightest what Noel is on about. “So what?”, Noel repeats incredulously, “so now he’s probably thinking we’re two fags getting off in the back of the cinema!” “I’m not a fag though, I like girls as well, me”, Liam says as if that was the issue here.</p><p> </p><p>Noel laughs again, half bitterly, half just taken aback by his little brother’s bent way of thinking, “you do know that he doesn’t know that though, right? He just thinks that you’re some poof who likes taking it up the arse.” Liam shrugs again, “he can think what he wants, I don’t care. Why’re you so bothered what that cunt thinks?”</p><p> </p><p>Noel doesn’t know what to say to that. The little lunatic who’s apparently never even given the hint of a fuck about what other people might think about him wouldn’t understand it anyway. He turns away and focuses on the screen where the film has just started playing and decides to ignore Liam for the duration of it. That’s easier said than done though, because next to him Liam begins to stretch and yawn loudly and then there’s a long arm sneaking around his neck.</p><p> </p><p>He keeps staring straight ahead, wondering if Liam will get on his own how ridiculously he is behaving or if he should give him a pointer, but before he can settle on either, Liam’s hand starts caressing his shoulder. At first it’s only over Noel’s jacket but then he feels Liam’s fingers slipping underneath his collar and twisting their way between the jacket and his shirt. It’s still kind of chaste, no one is touching skin, but then Liam leans over until his nose almost touches Noel’s ear.</p><p> </p><p>“Did I do that right?”, he breathes. Against his own will Noel turns his head so his face is only millimetres away from his brother’s. “Do what right?”, he asks and Liam grins proudly and says, “y’know, the move! Like on a real date, yeah?” He tightens his hand on Noel’s shoulder as to emphasize his point and Noel can’t help but roll his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh Liam, I’m swooning!”, he says dryly and raises his brows at his brother. Liam pretends not to notice Noel’s annoyance and leans forward to mumble in his ear, “’course you are. You love it.” His breath sends shivers down Noel’s back, so he backs away from him into the far corner of his seat, but of course Liam follows until he has practically climbed into Noel’s seat.</p><p> </p><p>“This is not proper date etiquette though, is it? You’re fucking crushing me”, Noel says while trying to turn his head away from Liam whose face is now hovering uncomfortably close to his. “And you slobbering all over me before the movie even started is, or what?”, Liam says too loudly for this level of proximity, “fuck, Noel, you’re being a right slag.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’m being a slag? I think you’re the one who crawled in my lap like some tart!”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, but only because you want it.”</p><p> </p><p>“What kind of logic is that? You’re still the one sitting on me!”</p><p> </p><p>“But you like it though, right?”, Liam moves closer, his lips nearly touching Noel’s. “You like it when I make you feel hot.” He touches Noel’s burning neck and his lips brush along his mouth.</p><p> </p><p>Noel feels his eyelids flutter and his hands find Liam’s hips. “C’mon Liam.”</p><p> </p><p>“C’mon what?”</p><p> </p><p>“Kiss me, you twat”, Noel says and his voice is embarrassingly hoarse.</p><p> </p><p>“No.” Liam pulls away and grins smugly from a safe distance where Noel can’t just grab him and make him kiss him.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking – don’t be a brat, Liam. Come here.”</p><p> </p><p>“Nah, I don’t kiss on first dates, right? I’m not a slag.” Even Liam’s voice sounds smug like he knows that he’s got his brother where he wants him. And Noel could tell him that he’s just kissed him in front of a stranger which probably is first class slag-behaviour, but he knows that he doesn’t stand a chance against Liam now. When he’s got something in his head there’s no bribing and no begging that could get him off it.</p><p> </p><p>Better try to play it his way then. “Y’know, I’ve gone out with lots of girls who’d give me a kiss on the first date and they weren’t no slags, right?”, he tells Liam. Jealousy is a great thing to get him to do things.</p><p> </p><p>But not today apparently, Liam smiles and says, “I’m not one of your girls though. I’m special, me.” Exhausting is what he is, Noel thinks, but he keeps his mouth shut, because despite all that he’s still itching to get his hands on Liam again.</p><p> </p><p>“Right. You’re very special”, he says slowly and refrains from drenching <em>special </em>in sarcasm, “and what would one need to do to get someone so special to put out on a <em>first date</em>?” Honestly, Liam should be on his knees just for him saying that. And his eyes do brighten at his words but he’s still not moving anywhere nearer to Noel, so Noel fears that he’ll have to give even more.</p><p> </p><p>“Well you know”, Liam begins and the way he’s blinking at Noel like he’s so smart is a close tie between being annoying enough to do his head in and the cutest thing he’s ever seen, “I could be convinced to let you touch me if I knew this was going somewhere.” He says it like those women in movies or on TV that try to make their boyfriends propose and promise them two children and one big house with a nice kitchen or something. It’d be absolutely hilarious if Noel wasn’t so concerned about what he’ll have to do to show Liam that this is <em>going somewhere</em>.</p><p> </p><p>“And where is this going then?”, he asks and immediately regrets it when Liam grins widely.</p><p> </p><p>He leans forward a tiny bit – still safely out of Noel’s reach – so that Noel can see his eyes glistening with mad joy and says, “I’ll kiss you if you are my boyfriend.”</p><p> </p><p>Noel sighs. He should’ve expected this, Liam’s been fucking obsessed with this idea for the last months. “Isn’t it a bit early to ask someone to be their boyfriend on a first date?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, but we’ve known each other all our lives, right? And you should ask <em>me</em> anyway”, Liam says like it’s obvious.</p><p> </p><p>Noel sighs again, long and deep and well-deserved, because he won’t be getting out of this without his pride at least slightly demolished. He can still stall a little though. “I’ve known <em>you</em> all <em>your </em>life”, he corrects, going for non-committed.</p><p> </p><p>“Whatever”, Liam says, but then follows with, “that’s exactly why you should be asking me!”</p><p> </p><p>“How is that a  reason?”, Noel inquires but he’s interrupted when Liam loses his patience. “Look, do you want to have me or not?” Noel does.</p><p> </p><p>“Liam”, he says and makes his voice as nice and smooth as he can while he fights down the sarcasm and indifference that he’s built up around this name, “do you want to be my boyfriend?” He knows he sounds like a pre-schooler on the playground, but Liam loves it, his eyes shine bright and his smile nearly splits his face in half.</p><p> </p><p>“Of course I’ll be your boyfriend, Noely”, he almost singsongs and Noel is suddenly struck with a vision of his own wedding, him and some woman and a priest going <em>speak now or forever hold your peace </em>when Liam barges in, wide-eyed and calling out <em>they can’t marry, I’m his boyfriend!</em></p><p>
  
</p><p>Noel suppresses his shudder and blinks at Liam. “Great, now would you maybe come a little closer? Can barely make you out from here, I should be able to see me new boyfriend, right?”</p><p> </p><p>“Right”, Liam grins and this time actually climbs into Noel’s lap. “I’m going to kiss you now”, he announces and Noel swallows his <em>I hope so</em>. He leans down and Noel tilts his head upwards, waiting for Liam to come to him. He closes his eyes when he feels Liam’s breath on his face and then Liam’s mouth presses against his. Their lips slide together and Noel catches Liam’s bottom lip between his and begins sucking on it the way he knows Liam likes.</p><p> </p><p>Liam’s hands come up to Noel’s shoulders, wander over his neck and wind into his hair and Noel lets him, because Liam’s tongue has found its way into his mouth and is twisting in this way that Noel taught him how to do. They continue to kiss for a while, full-on snog, before Liam becomes shifty in Noel’s lap and starts rocking down on his crotch. He’s moaning and sighing and his tongue is moving sloppily in Noel’s mouth like when he’s so turned on that he’ll just go putty in Noel’s hands.</p><p> </p><p>Noel can feel how hard Liam is already and he’s not much better, his jeans growing tighter by the second with the way Liam is grinding on him. “Noel”, Liam groans against his mouth, “c’mon.” He grabs his hand and tries to pull it to his crotch, thrusting towards him. But Noel winds his hand out of Liam’s grip and laughs breathlessly, “you sure you’re not a slag?”</p><p> </p><p>“Fuck you”, Liam answers, but his fingers are busy fiddling with Noel’s belt. He doesn’t get far though, Noel slaps his hand away and holds him in place so he can’t move.</p><p> </p><p>“We’re not doing it here, alright? That’s not happening.”</p><p> </p><p>“Toilets then?”, Liam asks and his eyes twinkle like he’s ready to sprint off just so he can get his hands on Noel’s cock.</p><p> </p><p>“Forget it. Wait til we’re home”, Noel tells him even though he’s well in the mood himself to drag Liam off to the bogs to have a quick shag. But the cinema is still practically empty and he’s really not up for being walked in on by concerned staff that heard Liam choking on his cock echoing around the bathroom.</p><p> </p><p>Liam rolls his eyes and jumps up, “right, let’s go then.” He reaches out his hand to help Noel up and Noel knows that he probably has no other choice than to come with him now. Not that he really wants to stay, and the promise of having Liam in an empty flat is rather convincing to walk out of this film that he’s maybe seen three shots of in total.</p><p> </p><p>He takes Liam’s hand, lets himself be pulled up and together they make their way down the stairs. Only halfway down Liam stops and turns around, hastily jumping up the stairs again before returning to Noel with the bag of popcorn in his hands. Noel wants to laugh at him, but he’s grinning so happily while stuffing a hand full in his mouth that Noel just stays quiet and walks out beside him.</p><p> </p><p>They somehow make their way back to Noel’s (Louise’s, but they’re <em>not </em>thinking about that now) flat, Liam holding onto his popcorn and Noel beside him, decidedly not looking at him chewing too loudly and walking with wide swinging arms and legs.</p><p> </p><p>Finally inside, Liam crumples up the now empty bag and throws it in the general direction of the bin. Of course it lands in the middle of the kitchen, sitting lovely on the blinking clean tiles. Noel goes over to pick it up and like he’s tied to him Liam comes with him. He grabs Noel’s bum when he bends over and gives it a good squeeze, cackling when Noel comes up again and glares at him. “What? I’m your boyfriend, I’m allowed to do that”, he grins.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking hell”, Noel mutters, but he keeps quiet still, because… well, it is Liam’s birthday. And he really doesn’t want to spend the rest of the evening watching Liam sulking and pouting when there’s a way better use for his mouth. “So what do you want to do now?”, he asks and throws the bag into the bin.</p><p> </p><p>Liam leans against the counter and looks at him with lust barely hiding behind his long lashes. “You fucking well know what I want”, he says, “Are you going to give it to me?”</p><p> </p><p>“Come on then”, Noel nods his head and walks out in the living room, Liam trailing behind him. He steers towards the sofa, but Liam holds him back by his arm. “You’re not trying to fuck me here, are you?”, his eyes look so big and Noel can see a shadow of hurt growing inside, so he shakes his head, “no, ‘course not, couldn’t shag me new boyfriend on the fucking sofa, right?”, and pulls Liam towards the bedroom.</p><p> </p><p>He leaves the door open because it’s so rare to be alone and he wants to feel it. Liam is already half out of his shirt when Noel turns around to him. His hair is messed up and Noel lets his eyes wander over the other hair that is growing along his lanky body, looking so soft but already rough to the touch. Liam looks at him while he opens his belt and unzips his jeans, his movement a weird mix of slow and teasing and his usual rushed impatience.</p><p> </p><p>He pulls his jeans down over his hips – and of course he’s not wearing any underwear underneath, the randy fucker – and steps out of them, leaving them in a crumpled mess next to the bed. “C’mon, you too”, he says and his eyes practically strip Noel of his clothes themselves.</p><p> </p><p>“Right.” He begins unbuttoning his shirt and tries to forget that it’s his little brother he’s undressing for. Liam dragging his hand over his hard cock and staring wider with every strip of skin that Noel reveals isn’t helping his case, even though his dick really seems to like it. He hangs his shirt over the chair beside the bed and gets to work on his jeans, unbuckling his belt and dragging them down together with his boxers until he’s equally as naked as Liam.</p><p> </p><p>He steps towards him until he can feel Liam’s body heat on his skin and slowly touches him, runs his hands over Liam’s stomach and up his sides, trying to feel out what to do next. But before he can decide on anything, Liam wraps his arms around him and lets himself fall backwards onto the bed, taking Noel tumbling with him. He finds himself on top of Liam, their legs slotting together and their dicks pressed up against each other.</p><p> </p><p>Liam sighs happily and pushes his hips up against Noel, letting him feel how he is already wet with precome. Noel props himself up with his arms on either side of Liam’s body and looks down at him, asking, “so how do you want it?”</p><p> </p><p>Liam smiles wide, clearly happy that his older brother is willing to consider his ideas and wishes. “Any way you want it, want to make you happy too, yeah?”, he answers and blinks his long lashes up at Noel. He’s a lot.</p><p> </p><p>“Christ, alright. Up on your hands and knees then”, Noel says and sits up, so Liam can get out from under him. Liam drags himself up slowly, kneels in front of Noel and gives his cock a quick tug before he turns around and lets himself fall forward, pushing his butt out to Noel.</p><p> </p><p>“That how you imagined it?”, he asks, turning his head so Noel can see him grinning cheekily.</p><p> </p><p>Noel decides to ignore that and places his hands on Liam’s arse, digging his thumbs between his cheeks and pulling them apart. He runs a finger over his hole and watches Liam shudder with the sensation, then dips his index finger in a little and laughs when he finds that Liam is wet inside already. “Came prepared, did you?”, he teases and pushes his finger in further.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, fingered meself right before you came over. Is it good?”, Liam says, still looking at Noel over his shoulder.</p><p> </p><p>“It is good”, Noel answers and lets his finger sink deeper inside Liam. The lube won’t be enough to actually fuck him like that, but right now he enjoys the illusion of Liam being able to take him all on his own. He pushes in up to his knuckle and curls his finger up to brush against Liam’s prostate. It makes Liam whimper and drop his head between his shoulders, giving Noel a taste of what it’ll be like when he’s fucking him properly and Liam turns to mush like he only exists to be fucked by Noel.</p><p> </p><p>He pushes in a second finger and he knows that he probably won’t get in a third one without adding extra lube, but this is still good and Liam has never minded a little burn. His eyes won’t leave his fingers dragging in and out of Liam, transfixed on his hole stretching around them and closing up again when he pulls out too far.</p><p> </p><p>When Liam starts hissing in a way that doesn’t sound as pleasurable anymore Noel leans forward to get the lube out of the bedside table. He squeezes a good amount over his fingers and goes in with three again. He strokes over Liam’s prostate to soothe the still painful sensation and soon he’s moaning and pushing back for more. “Fuck, Noel, you can put it in now”, he pants when Noel gets him especially good.</p><p> </p><p>And Noel can’t wait any longer either, he’s been aching to feel Liam the whole day and he needs it now. He pulls his fingers out and squeezes more lube in his hand so he can spread it over his cock. Liam turns his head around to him again and his eyes seem ten shades darker with lust. God, Noel needs to have him now.</p><p> </p><p>“Ready?”, he asks and Liam nods, his mouth falling open when Noel starts to push in. Liam feels fucking good around him, tight and hot and the sounds he’s making have Noel growing even harder inside him if that’s even possible. He’s still going slow, giving Liam time to get used to it again until his groans are starting to sound more and more frustrated.</p><p> </p><p>“Need it harder, baby?”, Noel asks and the nickname surprises himself. Nothing he’d ever call any of his girlfriends, but somehow it fits Liam. And he seems to like it as well, breathing in harshly like he’s spluttering on nothing but air and Noel could get used to that. He begins thrusting into him harder and places his hands on Liam’s hips to hold him steady.</p><p> </p><p>“Feels good, baby?”, he asks and this time Liam answers. “Yeah, yeah, feels so good, Noel. Do you like it?”, he gets out between little groans when Noel hits his prostate and Noel doesn’t understand how he does it, asking that like a little angel while he’s on his knees being fucked by his brother. But he likes it, his chest burns with how much he does, and he thrusts deeper into him.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking love it”, he tells Liam, “doing so well, baby.” And he’s so close already, but he can’t come before Liam does, so he wraps his hand around his cock and starts pulling him off in time with his thrusts. Liam whines and tries to grind himself back on Noel’s cock, but Noel holds him still so he can fuck him at a rough pace and keep wanking him off at the same time.</p><p> </p><p>It’s not long until he feels Liam trembling underneath him, his arms are shaking and his moans sound higher and more frantic and Noel only has to squeeze him harder in his hand and stroke him two, three times until he’s coming. He spills all over Noel’s hand and clenches down hard on his cock and Noel feels his own orgasm building in his belly.</p><p> </p><p>“Can you do that once more, baby?”, he asks and Liam does, squeezes around him with an exhausted sigh and Noel whites out. His hips are still thrusting into Liam and his fingers dig into his hips while he’s releasing his come deep inside him.</p><p> </p><p>He pulls out when he’s finished and lets himself fall down next to Liam, who’s laid down flat on his stomach. His eyes fall shut and he feels sleep tugging at him, Liam already seems to be far away, snoring lightly with his mouth open. Dried fluids are a problem for later, he thinks, before he drifts off.</p><p>---</p><p>“Baby”, Noel says somewhere between a lazy smile and a glowing cigarette. Or maybe it’s a glowing smile and a lazy cigarette, but Liam can’t be bothered thinking about it. He’s sitting on the edge of Noel’s bed, the frame digging uncomfortably into his naked thigh while Noel lies sprawled out on the matrass, legs tangled in the sheets and he’s feeling happy.</p><p> </p><p>Liam can’t remember the last time he’s seen Noel this calm and known that he actually is, not just pretending he isn’t feeling the exact same maddening thunderstorm inside as Liam. But he’s so relaxed right now and it’s rubbing off on Liam, quieting down the constant noise in his head and slowing down his erratic antics.</p><p> </p><p>He pulls his legs up on the bed again and leans against the bedpost so he faces Noel. His eyes sweep over his chest up his neck and over his face and fast away again, because Liam can’t look at his brother for longer than a few seconds without his insides starting to burn and tighten until he feels like he won’t be able to take a next breath.</p><p> </p><p>Noel holds the cigarette out for him and Liam bends forward to take it out of his hands. Their fingers brush and Liam feels ridiculous when his heart rate speeds up for a second, because Noel is his brother and he must’ve touched him this way more than a thousand times already. But Noel smiles at him in a way that Liam isn’t sure he’ll ever even reach a hundred times of during his whole lifetime, so maybe that’s an alright reason to grin as dumb as he does right now.</p><p> </p><p>Noel seems to like it anyway, he’s moved his leg so it’s pressed up against Liam’s and his eyes follow his fingers when he takes a drag of the cigarette. Liam exhales and goes on to pass it back to Noel, but some of the ash comes loose and bites into his thigh where it falls down. Liam flicks it away but his skin is already angry red and it stings quite badly.</p><p> </p><p>“Fucking hell”, he mutters under his breath and tries to soothe it rubbing his finger over it, but that only makes it hurt more. He expects Noel to laugh at him, but when he looks over his brother has gotten up and comes crawling towards him. He lies down on his stomach between Liam’s legs, turns his head into his thigh and licks over the stinging spot.</p><p> </p><p>His tongue feels soft and cool on his burnt skin and it’s a lovely sensation, Liam thinks. Almost too lovely for the way his cock comes alive against his thigh again, fattening up fast while Noel keeps licking over his stinging skin. He slides down a bit trying to see Noel’s face and pushes his cock closer to him in the process. That wasn’t really what he intended, but Noel starts licking upwards until he reaches Liam’s cock and then just closes his mouth around it in one fluid motion.</p><p> </p><p>He swallows him down whole until Liam feels himself hitting the back of Noel’s throat and he can’t suppress the tiny moan that escapes his throat. Noel is bobbing his head up and down between his legs and Liam’s eyes cross when he thinks too hard about the fact that it’s his big brother who’s sucking his cock this eagerly. Because normally Noel isn’t like that, never just gives without making Liam ask for it first and never just does it without making Liam feel small before.</p><p> </p><p>But now he takes Liam so far down his throat that it has to be at least slightly uncomfortable and without getting anything out of it. Or at least not directly, because Liam can hear him whimper around his cock the way he does when he’s so hard he’s about to burst. He rips his eyes from Noel’s head between his thighs and lets them wander over his arched back and naked arse and thighs and watches Noel grinding against the matrass.</p><p> </p><p>It’s fucking hot, seeing how he affects Noel and he feels himself blurting out a spurt of precome inside his mouth. Noel swallows it, Liam feels his throat contracting and he can’t help but thrust upwards a bit. And miraculously Noel doesn’t pull off at that or pins him down but goes with it and even sucks him harder. His hips are shifting more now and Liam wishes he could see Noel’s cock and how hard he’s made him.</p><p> </p><p>But he stops thinking when there’s a finger pushing against his rim. Somehow Noel has wound his hand underneath him and started to slowly work the tip of his finger in. Not far, his sweat isn’t enough to lube it up properly, but it still feels so good and he’s close now. He’s writhing under his touch and Noel grabs his thigh to hold him still while he forces his finger in a bit further and hollows his cheeks around Liam’s cock.</p><p> </p><p>His hips buck up and Noel makes a protesting sound, but keeps his mouth closed around him and it’s so tight and wet and hot and he’s inside Liam and it’s all too much. Liam’s muscles tense up and then he’s trembling and gripping the sheets and releasing thick ropes of come in Noel’s mouth. Noel chokes a little, but he swallows as good as he can and only slides off when Liam’s cock goes soft inside his mouth.</p><p> </p><p>He gets up and kneels in front of him then. Liam feels exhausted but he keeps his eyes open to look at his brother and more importantly at his cock that’s curving up to his stomach. He watches Noel wrap his hand around it and stroking fast, the precome dribbling down his shaft making his hand glide over it with obscenely wet sounds.</p><p> </p><p>He looks up and finds Noel staring at him with burning eyes. His mouth is red and wet and Liam knows it’s because he was drooling over his cock just seconds ago. He leans forward and tries to kiss him, but Noel puts his unoccupied hand on his chest and pushes him back.</p><p> </p><p>Liam wants to protest but the look in Noel’s eyes keeps his mouth shut and he stares back at him while Noel lets his eyes wander over his face, clinging to his lips before returning to his eyes. He begins to shudder and shake soon, all while keeping his eyes fixed on Liam who starts to feel hotter under his stare by the second. He wishes he could touch Noel but he’s too afraid to break this thing between them that Noel has built with only his mouth and hands and his eyes. So he just keeps watching his brother wanking off to his face until Noel finally comes and spurts hot come all over his and Liam’s stomach.</p><p> </p><p>He sinks back and sits on his heels after he’s finished and still looks at Liam with hazy eyes. Liam wonders if that’s it now, if Noel will stay like that forever, just sitting and staring, but after a little while he seems to come to his senses again and gets up to sit down next to Liam. He puts his arm around his shoulder and pulls Liam down so his head is resting in the crook of Noel’s neck and begins to softly stroke his hair like when they were children and Noel tried to put the both of them to sleep this way.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re a good boyfriend”, he says and Liam knows he’s teasing, but his heart swells with pride nonetheless. He presses his head further into Noel’s skin and Noel’s hand in his hair holds him closer.</p><p> </p>
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